Amreeka

I have recently returned home for a visit to the US after 16 months abroad. I am currently, as indicated by my writing at 3am, still caught in Cairo time but greatly enjoying my first 24 hours back in the land of the free.

My first 24 hours could partially be characterized as an ardent embrace and reorientation into American consumerism. Within an hour I was eating at the best Mexican restaurant in town, appreciating the glory of endless refills of water, sweet tea, and soft drinks (not to mention some to die for food). That's right, I will never take free unlimited water at restaurants, complete with a slice of lemon, for granted again. That joy is not even to be found in Europe. I drove my car for the first time- as enjoyable as finding a newborn freedom - stretching my legs on the wide open Texas highway with the stereo-system thumping like I was in a concert. Get your bling and your party on b@tc#e$. All the cars seemed huge, new, and spotless. The West Texas air was pure and cold. I spend over an hour mindlessly wandering the aisles of the local HEB- looking at the size and quantity of food and other commodities- the width of the aisles- the cleanliness of the floors- the functionality of the enormous grocery baskets- the observance of line etiquette- people laughing and running around in Santa hats and elf ears. It made me happy- it felt like home- it felt like I was in a foreign country- it felt like I was at Disneyland- it felt perfectly natural- I felt guilty- I felt deserving- I was confused- I was anxious to remember how to act in all this- to not give away that I was undergoing a re-enculturation into my own land. I felt all of this in one moment...the pure joy of absolutely loving all these things about America and the guilt of remembering those less fortunate...the majority. I thought of everything that occurs outside these arbitrarily marked lines of sovereignty so that such goods and services are available in my local HEB...

Most people might tell me to lighten up over Christmas. Don't get me wrong- I am ecstatic to be home. Seeing my family again is exponentially the best part. But it is interesting to think about how I feel. I have been gone before- 3 months, 9 months, etc- and returned with similar sensations...but I have never been gone this long.

As an American it is easy to travel anywhere. We think of the world as an increasingly closer place. Distances grow shorter for us as travel becomes easier and planes get faster. But we do not consider that they grow longer and harder for others- even fellow Americans. I hadn't quite forgotten how flying back into America seems comparable to trying to breach a fortress. Even I, the typical anglo-american girl, felt a bit of apprehension going back through all the various security obstacles that started as far bak as Cairo...there was the slightest hint of wonder if I would get hung up or let back into this mystical land of the free. No, we cannot give you your boarding passes all the way through, they said in Cairo. You have to get them at the desk in Frankfurt. In Germany I was questioned for 10 minutes before I was let to the desk to get my remaining two boarding passes. Then I went through the usual security again at the gate- standing in line for a hour just to be able to be allowed on the plane. Intimate but professional moment and pat down with a German woman. No, even the liquids you bought at duty free need to be put in the plastic bags. In flight announcement "On any flights to the US you may only use the lavatory next to you." Thank you underwear bomber. I want to punch you in the face. Arrival in Dallas: stand in line (if foreign go through photo and finger-printing) for an hour to get through immigration, get your bags, stand in line for an hour through customs, recheck the bags, go out of the international terminal and re-enter the airport and go through American airport security all over again. Then you can get on your domestic flight- welcome to America. You made it.

Now, I am not hating on security per say. But I went through all of this- me, your non-suspicious looking white girl. What is it like for others? Let me be typical and say- what is it like for Arab Americans every time they want to re-enter the country? Distances become longer through time. I can fly to anywhere in the world, relatively speaking, and be let in without note or hassle- just some cash for a visa. The world is my tourist playground...I have the right passport and currency. I can go to the French countryside and drink my heart's content of wine or wander the slums of Mumbai getting my fix of noting just how damn poor the rest of the world is. But, the catch is, I can always leave. This is not my world- it can be just an impersonal curiosity if I choose. Then the guilt sets in.

Many Americans are quite content with their lives and sight-seeing within the country. Why go somewhere else and look at it if this is the best country in the world? There's TV and such- we can see all we want through that. Then there's much of the rest of the world- who would rather be anywhere but where they are...but still attached to home and a familiar life. Just observations really...now if I could just go to sleep...

The Epic Struggle for Internet

This is most certainly a story for comic relief more than anything else. It's one of those moments my particular scholarship organization tends to value more than others...these are the experiences that you tell in later years laughing around some drinks I suppose.

So, approximately two weeks ago a severe crisis occurred in my house: the internet went out. I don't know about anyone else but I start to have panic attacks when I am not immediately connected to the world wide web...not to mention that Skype and my other modes of communicating to the States goes out the window. Yes, I do have the 3G on my iPhone that I can actually steal for my computer but who knows how many Egyptian pounds that will be if I go over my data usage.

Now, mind you, the internet going out entirely or just being plain unstable is a relatively frequent event around these parts (not to mention daily power outages, water outages, or a loss of only half your power...no one has given me a decent explanation for that phenomenon yet). So, I called trusty LinkDSL to ask them to come fix my internet since this was obviously not one of these random outages that will eventually right itself. A few phone calls later I learn, much to my stupidity, that there is another phone bill I am supposed to have been paying the entire time I have lived here and finally Telecom Egypt decided to cut the line off entirely. No bill had ever come to the house, I don't ever use my land line in typical Generation Y fashion, and I had no idea I apparently had 9 months of phone bill to pay. Telecom Egypt refused to let LinkDSL repair my line until I paid the bill. Great.

The next day I had no classes (about 2 days later) I set off to the local Telecom Egypt office. There was a very polite lady working at the desk and I internally patted myself on the back that communication in Arabic seems relatively easy these days...until she told me my phone number does not exist. I assured her it did exist and I had been using DSL the entire time I had lived in Egypt. Are you new? No, I have lived here for 15 months. Are you sure this is your phone number? Yes, I am sure. Well it doesn't exist. Well I assure you it does because you guys cut off my line for not paying my bill. I don't see this number in the system.

I paused and threw my hands up. What am I supposed to do now? After some time another gentleman realized that since my bill was SO delinquent it was not in their system and I would have to go down to the Central office. Fantastic. I set off walking, my preferred form of transportation most of the time, and arrived at Central ready to confront the worst of bureaucracy. Little did I know...

After making my way through a series of the typical "No you need to speak to that person" I finally found someone who could help me and confirmed that my phone number did in fact exist. He pulled up my bill and sent me to separate desk to pay. Shockingly enough, the 9 month bill was only around 150 LE (about 25 bucks). Talk about breaking the bank. After I paid I returned to the first desk and was informed that my phone should be restored the next day. If not, call and give them this confirmation number. I felt victory in my grasp and made my way back home on foot. In the meantime, a putrid green Volkswagen bug (its always the men with the hideous cars who do this) started following me. I watched out of my peripheral vision as what looked to be a dingy older man yelled at me and told me to get in his car. I tried my usual tactic of ignoring the situation. I thought he had gone until I realized he had intersected my path at the next intersection to try for round two. I signaled something that could be translated as "Get the eff away from me, I am not interested." Stumbling to go around the car I lost my footing for a bit and got one of the many shards of glass covering Cairo sidewalks stuck in my sandal and cut open my foot. I pulled it out and kept walking angrily trying to get away from the jerk. He tried one last time to intercept me and I lost all composure or knowledge of Arabic. But I think my aggressive English needs no translation here. He finally left and I made it back to my house thinking of my friend's horrific story about how she cut her foot in Cairo and almost died of staff infection before reaching the US. Much peroxide and washing ensued.

A day follows. Another day. Egypt's elections take place. People get beat, tear gassed, and shot in the street. Swell. My internet and phone line had still not been restored. I called Telecom Egypt with my trusty confirmation number. "What is this number? What does this mean?" says the voice at the other end of the line. Great. "No, you must come back to our office and show us you receipt." Even better, another trip to Central. I make the journey again with closed toed shoes, wary of green Volkswagens. This time I meet a very helpful and nice Mr. Khaled who is genuinely interested in resolving my problem. He goes through all sorts of activities, running from desk to desk, assuring me he will have it resolved immediately. After an hour he tells me to go home, my phone should work. If not, here's his cellphone number. Again I felt as though life-saving internet was almost in my grasp. I left cheerfully, though this time took a taxi.

The phone was not on. I waited. This is Egypt after all. I mean, AT&T isn't exactly the most customer friendly and responsive company on the planet either. After 2 hours I called Khaled who seemed confused and told me a technician would be on his way to resolve the issue. A technician never appeared and at this point, it was late into the evening. The next day I called LinkDSL to see if they would be able to get into Central now to resolve the internet. What does the light on your router say? No, no, you don't understand. Did you just listen to the story I told you? Madaam you must turn the router on and off so that the lights can reset. Dude, its not the router! Finally he said a technician would be en route. Well, better than nothing.

Later that afternoon my Arabic tutor was at the house when the technician from LinkDSL called back. Telecom Egypt says you have not paid your bill. No I assure you that I have paid it. Well they say you have not. You must come to the Central office. I looked at my tutor and asked with my body language if there was something wrong with my Arabic. No. Finally I just handed the phone to her because I was getting too frustrated to carry out a conversation that would be just as circular in English. Finally my tutor hangs up the phone and says we are going to Central NOW and she is coming with me. She was angrier than me with the situation at this point. I was thankful God had finally sent an angel to deal with the internet crisis. We jump in a taxi and I arrive at the Central office for the third time. This time we meet a very nice Miss Yasmeen who tells me that she called my land telephone number and spoke with someone on the other end of the line who told her the phone worked. What? I am the only person who lives in my house! She then proceeded to dial the number and began talking to a man who was supposedly answering the phone in my house. At this point I just threw my arms up in confusion.

"What is your phone number again?" I told her and she looked at the receipt. Oh, there was one wrong number in the phone number that I had paid. It just so happens that phone had been turned off too. So, I had paid some grateful Egyptian family's phone bill and now their phone was working. Can I get that money back? Well, you will have to make a deal with the other customer. I told her I didn't care about that right now, could I PLEASE just get my phone turned on. No, not today, it was past the hour for being able pay one's bill. It is 330 pm. You will have to come back tomorrow. I have been here three times. I am sorry but I promise if you come back tomorrow it will work. At this point my Arabic tutor exploded and demanded that something be done so I did not have to come back. She would not take no for an answer. Eventually we decided I would leave the money and Khaled would pay the bill himself with my money when he came in for work the next morning. Yasmeen would call Khaled to tell him the deal. Tomorrow, God willing, my phone would work. It had been a week since I tried to pay the bill the first time.

Tomorrow came. In paranoia I called Khaled at noon to see if the bill had been paid. He didn't know what I was talking about. I told him the story and he said he would call Yasmeen to see where she put the money. I called back a half hour later and he said Yasmeen was not answering her phone. I decided to walk back to Telecom Egypt for the 4th time. When I arrived Khaled smiled and handed me my change. Paying the bill had been resolved since I had last spoken to him. What more could he do for me. Turn the phone ON. Well it is Thursday and the weekend is coming up. NO, I AM NOT LEAVING UNTIL MY PHONE IS TURNED ON. This is not my job. I AM STILL NOT LEAVING UNTIL MY PHONE IS TURNED ON. Realizing that this crazy American girl was dead serious he finally cut a few corners and said that after an hour the phone would be turned on from Central. Great.

Back at home, one hour later, the phone was still not on. I called Khaled. Oh, we have to send a technician to your house to turn on the line from there as well. When will this happen? God willing in a couple hours. Great. Finally, at 6pm on Thursday my phone line was restored. Sadly, the internet was not back. I made one last phone call to LinkDSL. No, no, no it's not my modem. Oh, well we don't work over the weekend so you will have to wait until Sunday. Sigh...oh, Egypt.

The good news is that my internet was restored that Sunday and the epic struggle ended.
I called my Grandmother and she gently chastised me with "Where have you been? You have not called."

"You don't even want to know..."

And as a blanket notice: my foot healed fine.

How we treat our Citizens...

I am supposed to be working on other things right now revolving around the usual topic of the Middle East and Arab American relations. However, the last two hours turned into a discussion with the other Cairo scholar (hopefully he will not mind me plagiarizing some of his comments) about the TSA and pretty much how George Orwell's "1984" might actually be coming into being.

I am not one to make dramatic leaps and comparisons of this nature. But the TSA, in my opinion, has absolutely lost its mind. We are truly going overboard in the name of security. We are humiliating people, our own citizens, in the name of what? We freak out if we try to provide this amount of security at our own borders. If these types of implementations were put on the border everyone would lose their minds about how we are treating immigrants unfairly...but our own citizens? Well, I guess we can do whatever to them in the name oh so sacred security.

Apparently someone on Fox News (always my favorite) made some remark about how men and women in the armed forces put their lives on the line every day so American citizens should make this small sacrifice in the name of security. I'll tell you what, THIS IS NOT the freedom that the men and women of the military stand for and protect. The military does not go to war so that our grandmothers and children can get groped by the TSA every time they want to take a flight. Indeed, if this is where our country is going, the terrorists have truly won. They have.

Backing away from the pure outrage and absurdity of the situation, lets just look at some of the logistics of it. The current scanners would not detect the underwear bomber of last Christmas. As Jeff Goldberg pointed out, they don't do anything for cavity bombs (God help us when we start addressing that issue). And lastly, all anyone has to do to cause an equal amount of mayhem and fear is detonate a bomb in the security line. Am I supposed to go creeping about my country afraid that everyone might be the next terrorist lurking behind the bushes? It's absurd. It's paranoid. This is not America. What are we doing?

Why don't we expend this amount of energy and money dealing with our borders? There is pretty much a war going on South of us...but we rarely seem to care about that, usually in the name of being politically correct and sensitive. I'm all about these things but not to the extent that our own citizens are being treated like garbage.

I am not looking forward to flying back to the US anytime soon...

Probably too deep and serious to be a blog entry

I just finished one of the best and thought-provoking books I have read in a while, Derek Gregory's, The Colonial Present. I've been thinking about it, in my usual tendency to be overly serious about everything, for the last few days. It was, of course, mandatory reading for class and as it is THE one book out of many that the professor made mandatory for everyone to review, I somehow feel gullible and as though I am falling into a brainwashing trap. But that is probably my paranoia speaking.

The last seven weeks has been an intellectual journey that has led me full circle back to my perspective I held five years ago when graduating from UCLA. It is not the same location of course but I have tread a familiar path back to where I left off. I feel myself being fractured into at least two "me's" or two perspectives so to speak. Being able to better describe the world, its hidden power structures, its continuing but inadequately articulated "architectures of enmity" has considerable political and strategic relevance. I firmly believe I am a citizen of the "United States of Amnesia," the reluctant super-power, the executer of "empire-lite" who would rather not regard itself as such. There is no question in my mind. This understanding can of course be used to further US interests and values in the world; they are of course interests and values I find pleasing. The rhetoric anyway. This is strategic 'me' so to speak. Then there is the detail that comes from the excluded side, the dominated, the 'other.' Then comes in universal justice 'me.' It isn't right for some things to be ignored. Gregory's depiction of the physical and mental horrors or war and occupation are insightful, penetrating, and certainly realistic.

Do I believe that this is some sort of deviation from war as it has always been? No. It has, as much as we all like to sanitize it with ideas like "smart bombs", retained its indescribable brutality and terror. Only watching the trajectory of a Tomahawk cruise missile from the video-game-like combat information center of a warship does not eliminate the terror, destruction, and lives lost on the other side. People become merely objects or targets when we look at those screens. It is brutal...but I am under no illusion that this mental gymnastic exercise has not been present for any military engaging in combat throughout the span of human history. What sort of mental gymnastics must have been involved for the countless atrocities and brutalities committed from the times of the Assyrians, to Caesar, to the Mayan ceremonial war culture, to Muslim conquests and the following crusades? It has never, in the end, been romantic, precise, clean, or fully justified. In war there is always the dehumanized 'other'; Gregory's homer sacer who is outside the law and outside any human rights. It is truly horrifying. And we create that "fictive 'we'" for the viewers back home; "a vantage point was carefully constructed to privilege and protect the (American) viewer through the fabrication of (American) innocence and the demonization of the (Iraqi) enemy." I agree, we do this. The media performs for the American public; it's all propaganda, I don't question that. How else to you maintain a national support for war? It is the brutal, ugly fact and truth that is really easy to say as I sit here and drink my french-pressed coffee, positioned above my persian carpets and in my marbled-floor flat worthy of Cleopatra.

So we have the cold realist take: this is an effed world and every country for themselves. If it wasn't us doing it then it would be someone else making us into the homo sacer. We could take that a step further and say "at least American values are 'nice' for the most part." At least we aren't fascist, or trying to further a theocracy. You could have China come in as the 'colonizer' with its lack of moral screening and support for oppression as long as it gets stability and access to the production and goods it needs...but then we forget that we do the same thing. We only scream our support for democracy when it suits us, for better or worse.

Is there a way to stop the human-made structures of power in the world from perpetuating such violence? Is it worth the try? Or is it really always just 'us' against 'them' in a war over who gets the ability to have privilege and freedom. Is this simply academic over-analysis of a cruel and hard world? Yeah, this is a bit serious for me to be writing in a blog I guess. But I like to rant about what is running through my mind.

I'll leave off with this excerpt from Paul William Roberts during Desert Storm:

"In places, not a building was left standing as far as I could see. By the road-side, at intervals, lying on makeshift beds in the misty, freezing damp, lay casualties crudely swaddled in bloodstained bandages. They were waiting, I learned later, for the few ambulances that daily made rounds, either treating the wounded where they were or carrying them off to overburdened, understaffed hospitals. Most doctors and nursing staff had been sent to the eastern front. So had all able-bodied men. We were bombing the defenseless, the old, women and children...

"Perhaps the description should be as surgical as the bombing was said to be. One girl, aged ten or so, with shrapnel wound to the abdomen, holding lower intestines in hands like snake's nest. Teenage boy, unconscious, head like a half-eaten boiled egg. Old woman coughing out a spray of blood...

"A little later, Muhie and some of the soldiers showed me an obliterated high-tech death-factory cunningly arranged to look as if it had been an elementary school. Scraps of kids' art projects fluttered beneath crumbling concrete slabs and twisted metal rods. A little exercise book lay stained by fire and rain, with the universal language of children's art and words etched in rudimentary English that were just too apt and too heartbreaking to be ever repeated."

The Plight of Animals in Egypt

I think I am starting to get a bad reputation in my building as that crazy American that cares far too much about animals, particularly dogs, than any normal person should. I am usually a huge fan of staying out of other people's business, especially as I harbor some very reclusive tendencies of my own. I am not the neighbor that goes about asking to borrow a cup of sugar or an egg. I don't even know the names of the people who live in my building. It is probably a product of spending all of my adult life prior to Egypt in metropolitan LA and San Diego.

But back to the point...the first instance I got involved in my neighbors' business was this summer, when my brother was out visiting. I kept hearing the hysterical barking of a large dog coming from below me...interesting considering that I live on the ground floor. It barked day and night for two days before I finally asked my bo'ab what on earth was going on down in the basement. I learned that one of the Egyptian owners of the building, the family who also own the villa next door, had decided to purchase a puppy but did not want it in the house. They apparently did not want it in the yard, near their villa, or any sort of normal interaction with it either. They had arranged for the bo'ab (who knew nothing about dogs and felt the typical Egyptian abhorrence towards dogs) to take care of the puppy in the basement.

My brother and I set off to investigate downstairs. We found a beautiful 6 month old chocolate lab locked in the room the size of a coat closet. It had no access to fresh water or food and was literally living in its own defecation...and anyone who knows dogs knows they would never do that unless they had not been given any other choice in a place to relieve themselves. It was starved for love and attention, the whole incident broke my heart. We immediately set to work, giving instructions on water and food. We took it out on a leash, I retrieved some of my dog treats and food from my apartment. The puppy was still healthy but it would not be for long if it was regulated to the basement indefinitely. I felt myself filled with rage...how could anyone rich enough to own two buildings in Cairo not feed their dog or take proper care of it? Why on earth did they even purchase this dog if they did not intend to interact with it? Sadly, it was a phenomenon I had seen a great deal in Egypt. I anguished over whether to directly confront the family or call my own landlord. My landlord is a dog owner herself, and a responsible one. I opted for the later option and I was happy to listen to her react with utter fury about the situation. I learned the next day (after my brother and I had set off on a trip to the Western desert) that the police had actually come and taken the dog away. I have no idea what happened to the poor creature. I can't think that its fate was any better. I only hope that it made it to one of the very few animal rescue organizations here in Egypt. I vowed that next time I might become more involved.

Next time has come, though not nearly as drastic. The same family has purchased a puppy German shepherd that is regulated to the small patch of grass outside the building and tended to by the bo'ab and building guard. I went out to investigate the situation this morning...I am not the only person who has taken notice. A British couple in the building across the street is also concerned with the situation and has brought the dog food. It has no direct access to water and is in not so great of health. I went through my usual sermon to the bo'ab of why the dog must have access to fresh water at all times...not to mention getting a walk. But he said this was up to the owner. Shall I join forces with my Anglo counterparts across the street and take this poor dog into my care? I am already the cat friendly house that provides a constant supply of cat food on my kitchen window ledge. I am probably going to join forces with the Army vet at the Navy Medical Research Unit Three and start taking the cats I can catch in for spade/neuter. The population is severely out of control. I refuse to be dissuaded by the argument that no one can make a dent in any problem afflicting Cairo.

The treatment of animals in Egypt bothers me as much as the people living in garbage cities. I often see goats heading to their slaughter tied down in the flat beds of pickups, or even put in trunks. I hate going to the pyramids not only because of the hassling, but because of the nearly starved horses and camels I see carrying tourists. I remember the shock on an American veterinarian's face when our Nile cruise group were taken by horse to one of the many ancient temples here in Egypt. He started examining the horses in sheer disgust and sadness.

There have been some bright spots. My friends who own a bed and breakfast in Luxor send much of their profits to a woman running an animal rehabilitation center in the area. The bed and breakfast owner has her own animals she has rescued as well, including a pet donkey, rabbits, a beautiful Afghan hound and other creatures.

I don't understand the mistreatment of animals in a society that long ago used to embalm their animals like they did their kings and queens. Well, it is not the same society I suppose...I am being guilty of essentialism. Everything must be considered in its historical context. I'll end this now that Sabah is calling me...she wants to know if I would like to attend the the goat slaughter at her house for Eid Al Adha. I should ask Alanis Morissette if that is ironic...

Victimization

I sit in my ivory tower, so to speak, listening to Cairo slowly come to wake on a slow Friday afternoon. The muezzin has already called across the city for the Friday noon prayer. When I was out earlier I saw the sheep and goats being collected, next week they will be slaughtered for the Eid. The weather is finally such that I do not sweat from the simple act of walking to the fruit and produce stands ten minutes away. The cool air makes the pollution more bearable, perhaps even pleasant...or perhaps I have just been here for too long now.

I am doing what I seem to always do now: reading. The texts somehow fill me with a slight melancholy these days. The problems are so great, the anger still boiling, the emotion running so high that it is near improbable to think that barriers will ever be penetrated. Maybe I project my own personal life and history onto the problems of this troubled region. One peoples and their circular arguments become one voice in my head that sounds more like a memory of my own past. It is the same style of arguing I come across in my own life and my own interactions. Perhaps I should stop being vague at the risk of offending.

I think I have read at least ten different pieces lately that discussed why the long history of American intervention in the Middle East increased radicalization. September 11th was not about radicals hating freedom and democracy. This type of rhetoric hides the truth from ourselves. Ultimately, September 11th was "blow back" from our policies in pursuit of our interests...it was the price of winning the cold war really. I am willing to accept all of this, but all to often it gets clothed in an air of legitimization. The dialogue goes one step too far in saying that it is all America's fault for being a target of political violence. As my friend says to me, if you follow through with this argument then you can then turn around and say that Al Qaeda is at fault for the US war in Iraq. Al Qaeda and radicalization brought it on the Middle East, not America. But you would never hear that argument coming from this side of the fence...at least I have not heard it. No, here you read about how America is the "in denial" colonial power stepping in with cultural imperialism, if you will...a more subtle and twisted version of the British...that's all I ever hear these days. Whether or not we are aware of it, we tread in the blood-stained boots of the previous colonials, all their sins are marked upon us. All of these various arguments have their valid points, but they all so often stop before their reasoning might touch upon any fault of their own. No one ever uses their own logic to apply to themselves. Everyone has been wronged. Everyone is too emotional and wrapped up in their own perspectives to try to look across the fence for a second.

It reminds me of debates in my personal life..."you should treat me like such and such but I will not apply that same logic in how I treat others. Why? Oh, well its a different situation because I have been so wronged. That standard does not apply to me personally in this situation."

I read again and again that ideology, colonialism, religion, etc. skews America's view of the Middle East and creates "Islamaphobia." Or Islamic movements aren't really religious, they are just political fronts covered by a thin veil of religiosity so that the rhetoric contrasts with the West's evil secular view that is meant to strip away cultural meanings from a conquered people. So is it religion or isn't it? It's religion if we can use it as an argument against the West and it's not religion when that might suggest that there is a problem in the region. I'm getting tired of it. I am getting tired of the constant victimization. I really am.

Plate Glass

I have no concrete idea to express here other than a simmering dissatisfaction with things I know that I have to be careful talking about.

I have had the pleasure these past couple weeks, so to speak, of being drawn back into professional circles that are working in Egypt. It draws me back into touch with my profession. I get to remember that I am not simply unattached and wandering through North Africa and the Middle East. I get to remember the jokes, the culture, sometimes the cynicism. And indeed, I get to feel a little bit like I am at home and speaking with those of similar background.

But I find that my experience here is substantially different, though I would not necessarily expect it to be that divergent. Sometimes in discussion I sense hints of the 19th century British empire drifting in on the wind, and it turns my stomach sour. Not in a conspiracy theory sense, but from the observations that come from observing a culture and a people through the plate glass of an armored land cruiser. It is another world actually...a world of bleach washed vegetables from local markets, household staff, and minimal contact with the millions of people that almost live on top of each other in this congested and diverse city. It is like touching Egypt with rubber gloves and breathing through a mask. I suddenly find that I have stepped into a weird bubble that lives within Egypt without being part of it.

Am I implying that there is some kind of superior knowledge gained from riding on packed microbuses to the Western desert, spending time with great local friends, walking through garbage cities and inhabited graveyards, knowing the feeling of having an Egyptian country mother literally sticking chicken liver into your mouth with her hand? I am not sure. I hate to put on airs like that. And I hate to make it seem as though I am some nonparticipant observer through it all. I don't look at it through a lens of us and them, my Egyptian friends vs. my Western friends, or my "exotic" experience. It is just life, people toiling away in our human condition trying to make the best of it all. We just all happened to be born in different places. These are my friends, my experiences, my life. My experiences woven up here in Egypt with everyone else who lives here...truly lives here. Perhaps that is why I find that quiet voice in me taking offense at the comments made over drinks with perfectly matching napkins. Am I judging? I don't mean to. But I find myself feeling more at odds with the weird world I step into from time to time...the world to which I am "supposed to belong." This world of professionals seems to be a weird manifestation of how people behave when not at home. I find myself getting very defensive about Egypt.

Does this have a point? Probably not. I guess my most pertinent point is how are you supposed to connect with and reach out to a people, exchange perspectives, build relationships, through plate glass, gloves, and bleach?

Don't be a Sucker...

And, not surprisingly, Yemen is back in the news after a new threat has emerged about a plot to mail explosives to the US. Also not surprisingly, the new threat has signs of affiliation with Al Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula. Even more disturbing, it looks as though Americans are assisting in this sinister endeavor and recruitment for Al Qaeda in the US is on the rise. What, then, is America to do with this named 'hot bed' of terrorism about the size of Texas?

To make such decisions it is prudent to remember the context and history of much of this situation instead regarding it with usual American wounded innocence every time someone acts like they don't like us. Who could hate America? Why do they hate us? It's just another bunch of crazy, psychotic terrorists right?

Let's back up for a second. The word terrorist can be problematic in many ways, especially the 'Islamic extremist terrorist.' The definition of terrorist is a relative one. This is not a new concept. One man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter or so the saying goes. These days, when we use the word terrorist, it seems to automatically assume that the individual or organization in question is simply evil, irrational, and obsessed with only a fundamentalist ideology. While I am not contesting the immorality of Al Qaeda's actions, I do find it disturbing that our assumptions and perceptions rob us of the perspective that terrorists are, in fact, not irrational. Many of them are well educated, well aware of US strategy, culture and politics, and are pursuing an objective that will include tactics based on how they expect the US to react. There are rational reasons and calculations behind the face of terrorism.

This whole situation reminds me of that Carly Simon song that was well before my time...

You're so vain
You probably think this song is about you
You're so vain
I'll bet you think this song is about you
Don't you? Don't you?

Isn't strategy 101 about knowing your enemy? What was one of Al Qaeda's primary goals in September 11th? What is Al Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula's goal? Is it all about the destruction of America or even Israel? NO! Their goals are about the overthrow of local secular Arab governments. The intention is to get the Arab (and others) world to identify itself as a Muslim world. It is about power in the region. What is the best way to get a group characterized by plurality and multiplicity to unite? A common enemy. By being able to construe American military action in the Middle East as a battle against Islam, an overwhelming population begins to believe itself as under this type of threat. America's perceived negative involvement in the Middle East adds fuel to the ideology...not to mention draining already damaged economic assets. There is more to power than sheer force.

I won't even go into why such groups have found themselves in Yemen or why they have so much power in the first place...I just hope the US doesn't get played for suckers.

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.

It has been quite a while since I have written. I was going to write something detached, maybe intelligent and observational about the world at large, but I suppose life has caught up with me for the moment. There are a million interesting things happening in the world now: the continuing attempt for Middle East peace, China's power plays on Japan, or the Taliban meeting with Karzai. But honestly, I have just watched it go by the past two weeks without making a comment.

Almost two weeks ago now I had to put my sixteen-year-old dog, my best friend, to sleep. It just about killed me. In fact, it was to date the hardest decision I have ever made. But through the experience I have learned just how much people can help, and why good friends truly matter. I felt myself caught in a network of support when I needed it the most. Friends and family brought me through to the end. I realized that I am not all alone in Cairo.

The women of Cairo have been the best experience of the past year. They open their heart to you quickly and with more warmth than you would expect. They are true friends who open their whole lives to you, plan surprise birthday parties, listen to your complaints, bring you fresh lemons and make you tea when you are sick. Indeed, one of my friends here called me ten minutes before the veterinarian arrived at my house to put my dog to sleep. She was close by and thinking of me. Without hesitation she came to the house and was there with me as I experienced the death of my friend. She literally held me up, and I literally cried on her shoulder. In my toughest moments, the women of Cairo have been here with me, a pillar of support.

I went away to Sharm el Sheikh last week, somewhat appropriate for the 6th of October holiday. I always find myself listening to stories about people's lives. I enjoy it very much, just as I enjoy smoking sheesha and watching people wander by in the street. I like to think of the thousands of years people have been wandering, carrying on their lives, in these old Egyptian cities. There are layers of humanity and existence across Cairo...literal mountains of refuse from habitation continuing years upon years. In Sharm I was lectured for what is probably the 20th time about Islam and the four wives discussion. I do find it amusing how men argue about how much women prefer this anyway...oh, the first wife will help him choose the second because it is both in their best interest. While this may be the occasional case, these aren't the stories I hear from women. After my lecturer departed the scene a woman started talking to me about our conversation. "Let me tell you about men and love in Egypt" she said with fire in her eyes. "My sister had a medical problem when she was younger and she knew from the doctor that she could never have children. She told her husband this before they married and he said it was fine, he needed no children. He loved her, that was all he needed. But after twenty years he told her he wanted children and he married a second wife. My sister cries every day." Then she told another story. "I used to be married and I had my first daughter. But my husband was not good and his family was from the south (Said). He told me he was divorcing me when I was still pregnant with twins. He just left. I was so angry at him and the situation, and there was no way for me to take care of more children. I got an abortion. Now I have my job and I will never marry again. The men say they love me but I do not care. I want only my job, and my daughter. I will never love again."

Today, back in Cairo, I received the ashes from my dog's cremation. It was hard to see my dog reduced to dust...like the dust and sand in the air of this ancient civilization, long obsessed with death. It was one of the clearest days I have seen in Cairo. From the Citadel I could see clear across the city to the pyramids of Giza. I rarely see them on the skyline thanks to the haze. Every time I see them it amazes me to think that they are more than four thousand years old. So we all continue living, layers upon layers of human lives, people literally living in graveyards, people living in the trash. They used to say that this was the mother of the world.

Concerns on Modernizing Yemen

Views in Yemen

Yemen has become a hot bed for Al Qaeda and loosely affiliated organizations and it has returned to the spotlight after the so called underwear bomber incident last Christmas (Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab was trained in Yemen). It is fast becoming a main focal point for our battle against terrorism. CENTCOM is proposing supplying 1.2 billion dollars in military aid so that the 50% illiterate and 35% unemployed Yemen can combat Al Qaeda. In other words, there is a proposition to modernize Yemen in hopes that is will suppress radical Islam and give the government the means to effectively fight back. We have seen a version of this story many times in past 60 years: Iran, Iraq, Libya. While I am of course not privy to all the details and do consider Yemen to be a hotbed, I am still concerned about this constant theme that continues to infiltrate American foreign policy and strategy: modernization, money, and "seeing the light" will bring developing countries in the Middle East to an understanding and agreement with the United States.

The idea that "modernizing" a country will bring stability is not a new strategy in our foreign policy though it gets touted a lot as some new counterinsurgency strategy. Does this sound familiar?

"The wave of revolutionary nationalism in the Middle East that crested with Nasser's seizure of the Suez Canal helped persuade U.S. leaders that the academic experts who frequently advised them that the restless societies of the Third World were likely to become the principal battle grounds for the Cold War during the decades ahead" (Little 2008, 195).

Truman later supported connections between stability and economic aid, etc. which was encapsulated in his Point Four Program. Kennedy and others would continue on this line of thinking. However, after a good portion of Africa, Latin America, and Asia seemed to be heading in the opposite direction Kissinger noted that "Economic aid, by accelerating the erosion of traditional (frequently feudal) order, often made political stability even harder to achieve" (Little 2008, 196).


America invested significantly in Iraq during the Eisenhower era and it was the foundation to the Baghdad pact which sought to promote cooperation among Middle Eastern states and defense against Soviet aggression. It was a shock to see the prowestern government overthrown by Qassim. The US also funded the shah of Iran for years believing that Iran would be a moderate Middle Eastern state with heavy Western influence. We all know what happened in the end: the shah was seen as a tool of Western power by his people. There was plenty of available ammunition for Khomeini to build the case that the shah had betrayed traditional Islamic values. Alas, all that modernization effort produced an Islamic revolution. These are just two of several examples of a similar story. While each of these cases are different, they still carry in them a certain lesson and theme that I think the US has never really learned. Investment, economic aid, or military modernization does not automatically bring about a desired course of events and often brings about the exact opposite because we have naive and sometimes arrogant expectations.

Be careful what you wish for?

To quote Douglas Little in American Orientalism, "Why has America's quest for the Muslim equivalent of Thomas Jefferson been met so often with the likes of Saddam Hussein, Muammar al-Qaddafi, and Ayatollah Khomeini?"

Again, I am not suggesting that the US abandon efforts in Yemen as it is obviously a location of great concern. I only hope we are being real in our expectations and our strategy before we decide to spend another billion dollars of tax payer money during a time when are national deficit is probably the most dangerous threat to our national security. I hope we are asking ourselves many questions. Is it somewhat arrogant for the US to assume that they can control what occurs in Yemen through modernization? Has this philosophy worked for us in the past? Are we still stuck in the somewhat naive rut of thinking thinking that "enlightenment" and "modernization" will bring the people of the world to seeing our point of view and not another prospective? And if they come to this "other prospective" do we really think events will always work in our favor?

I henceforth define "Orientalism" as...

A typical orientalist image.

My definition: Any description or observation made by a non Arab/Persian/Turk/Berber (you get my point) that has negative connotation or the potential thereof about Arabs/Persians/Turks/Berbers/etc and/or Muslims. Or any description of observation by the former about the later that implies any sort of responsibility on the part of sovereign nations in the Middle East and greater area for some of the problems that exist both domestically in those countries and in the international arena.

Some people might view that as an extreme definition but this definition is what I believe the term "orientalism" has begun to truly encapsulate. Now, of course, I do not discredit Edward Said for his observations made nearly 40 years ago. It is true that his version of Orientalism did and still does exist to an extent. However, it seems that in the academic community of the Middle East (at least here in Egypt) uses this term anytime anyone says anything disagreeable about the current state of affairs. Usually this "anyone" is a foreigner from the West. There are, however, a good number of students from the Far East who study Middle East politics and I plan to seek out their opinion on this current trend of discrediting anything disagreeable as "orientalist."

I concede that truly orientalist stereotypes and imagery still persist in the United States, such as Disney's Aladdin. As Douglas Little points out in American Orientalism, the love story is about "two rather Westernized Arabs, Aladdin and Princess Jasmine, whose English was flawless..." surrounded by "other inhabitants of their imaginary oriental sheikdom" depicted "as frightful thugs sporting turbans, daggers, and thick accents." Additionally, you cannot discount the lyrics of the opening song:

Oh I come from a land

From a far away place

Where the caravan camels roam

Where they cut off your ear

If the don't like your face

It's barbaric, but hey, it's home

Yes, this is most arguably a racist stereotype otherwise known in this context as "orientalist." I would, however, point out that this example comes from a Disney movie that is by no means supposed to be taken all too seriously. You can argue that we are subliminally implanting racist messages in our children but then again, perhaps Disney is also guilty of propagating gender stereotypes:

"Cinderella is a beautiful woman who cleans her house and does all of the chores that her evil stepmother (another gender bias) tells her to do. She is dependent on finding a man to come and sweep her off of her feet and save her from this terrible life. Prince Charming is of course the man to do it. He is handsome and everything that a girl could want in a guy. He is nothing short of perfect.

The perfect woman.

"Cinderella is forced to rely on a man to help her have a good life, even though she is smart, determined, and a wonderful girl, she cannot break out of her stereotypical lifestyle. The evil stepmother is a character that Disney likes to use often. The woman is typically the villain: Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, 101 Dalmatians, Cinderella, ect. Women are constantly portrayed as helpless creatures who lie around waiting for a man to save them from whatever predicament they got themselves into."

I will also concede that previous movies are also guilty of "orientalism" or reenacting the stereotype of the "white mans' burden." Lawrence of Arabia and even Indiana Jones fall into this category. I would also argue that the highly popular Avatar (extremely popular here in Egypt for its not so subtle analogy to the US invasion of Iraq) is yet another example of the noble savage stereotype. The tribes cannot save themselves without the help of the white man from the invaders. He is their savior and he is the only person who can ride their sacred bird. 

But, I do not agree that observations made in the realm of foreign policy always revolve around "orientalist" stereotyping. Cultural observations, while not perfect (they cannot be perfect considering that they are always subjective), are not always racist. Political observations are the same. I do not agree that I am being an "orientalist" if I observe that Egypt has no true method of animal control and that there are a preponderance of stray animals, often rabid, running the streets of Cairo. I'll take this a step further. If I want to analyze previous Arab wars and why they were potentially lost, I will need to make observations that often include cultural analysis. While this has the potential to seem racist because I may not a write a glowing report about why wars and battles were lost, this does not mean I am in some way degrading an entire race of people. The piece "Why the Arabs Lose Wars" is a great example of this phenomenon and is surely to be called "orientalist" in most academic circles. 

Now I will proceed with my "orientalist" and opinionated observations. The Middle East, particularly in the academic circles that should be leading the way for social change, is in a culture of victimization. No one is arguing that the colonial past was appropriate or justified. The very boundaries of nations created by the haggling between Britain and France at the conclusion of WWI are an example of the enormous influence and oppression Western powers projected onto the Middle East. However, the Middle East cannot continue to languish in the past and the injustices done. It produces very little results just as it produces very little results to blame most current injustices on the United States and Israel. The argument as to whether the accusations are true or not is not the point. If the Middle East continues to view themselves first and foremost as victims of Western powers who are unable to control their own destiny then there will be little reason to make an effort to change the current status quo. Constantly seeing yourself as a victim takes power out of your hands to change what you do not like. If it is America's job to fix the Middle East and resolve the Israel-Palestinian conflict then this by default removes the agency and the power from the hands of the people here. If the Middle East has had no ability to stop the injustices committed against it or alter the current state of affairs, then this is in affect a type of racism. It denies Arabs/Persians/etc the ability and power to effectively address their current situation. It denies them the ability to seek change themselves. In this world, no one is going to fix your situation for you even if they should. In the end, you will have to take charge yourself. Constantly bemoaning the past will not produce anything for the future.  

Cheating on the Middle East with China

I am cheating on the Middle East today and having a scandalous affair with China and the US strategy in place or rather, the continuing status quo in the region. There is an insightful and balanced article in this month's edition of Current History by David Shambaugh ("A New China Requires a New US Strategy") that outlines US insufficiency in the region and possible steps forward for correction. Unfortunately this article is not viewable online unless you have a subscription to the digital version Current History (another extra 10 bucks for print subscribers...geez). He notes, and I agree, that one of the more alarming dynamics of the relationship occurs between the two sides militaries and intelligence agencies. Both sides are currently in a reactive cycle of interpreting the each other's defense for offense and so on. The cycle is dangerous and might eventually spin out of control.

I am no stranger to China paranoia and the anxiety caused by constantly observing their military development, particularly in the form of Anti Ship Cruise Missiles (ASCMs) and Ballistic Missile capabilities. Their military actions do not seem to mesh with their diplomatic rhetoric. "Recent Chinese actions -- including the denial of safe harbor for U.S. naval ships, the surfacing of an attack submarine within striking distance of American warships, the buzzing of a Japanese navy ship by a Chinese helicopter in waters close to Japan, and the harassment of the USNS Impeccable, among others -- have all contributed to this dynamic" (Abraham Denmark and Zachary Hosford). However, the question in the back of my mind has always been whether or not we are fueling their reactions and vice versa in a vicious cycle. Of course this dynamic occurs somewhat but to what extent? Are we driving ourselves towards a confrontation? What is the US national strategy on China? What does the US want China to look like in the future? Regardless of some of these goals, there are some factors that the US should accept. Most of these go along with Shambaugh's article. 

Regardless of all the talk about the "China bubble" as one of my Japanese colleagues calls it, China is going to continue in economic growth. Perhaps the population crisis (also discussed in this month's Current History by Wang Feng) will come into play later down the road but China is not the only country dealing with an aging population issue. The young, cheap, labor market will perhaps not be an option for them in the future but this is not necessarily an inherent show stopper. So, China is going to keep growing economically. It is already a regional power in Asia and and is a rising global actor though not necessarily a truly global power. In fact, most of China's ambitions outside of its desire for natural resources seem to center around making itself THE power in SE Asia, extending into the South China Sea and the Pacific. This focus is still somewhat regional and not yet one of a power trying to seek global dominance. However, China is certainly not fully cooperating or approving of the current international systems and laws in place today and has not completely joined the community as a true team player. As many people point out, they may try to be a "revisionist" power in this Western dominated arena. In my opinion, this is where the most important "battlefield" with China is located. In light of China's status these days, the US should probably stop its general parental and patronizing attitude it often has in the international arena. China needs to be treated with respect (and caution) and as a global actor. It needs to have an excuse to come out of its "victimization" complex.

I agree with Shambaugh in that the contention over Taiwan is no longer a truly relevant issue. As he says, "game over." Taiwan and China are going to keep warming towards each other in the future. Taiwan's President actually said this year, "we will never ask the United States to fight for Taiwan." Maybe we should stop selling weapons to Taiwan and make China happy at least on that front. I am not sure we would be losing more than we would gain. I believe the US eventually wants to build mutual trust and agreement with China so that they are content with their inclusion and role within the international system. 

Returning to my original point, the cycle playing out between US and China militaries and intelligence communities is particularly worrisome. How do we stop this cycle from continuing? While I am much too cautious to advocate a cessation in our activity in the South China Sea (as Shambaugh recommends) it would be beneficial to take some baby steps in cooperation between navies, etc. We all care about anti-piracy and maritime security operations off the Horn of Africa. China has actually deployed assets from its Navy (a new move for them) to help with operations off of Somalia. Perhaps through interaction and mutual cooperation in arenas such as maritime security, US and China military personnel can build professional relationships and even a little trust. Maybe some damage can be done on the stereotypes that persist on each side. I am always an advocate of people-to-people interaction. In the end, this is where the real world actually happens. 

We can all make grand sweeping narratives, theories, and strategies about resolving international issues, but ultimately execution of strategy, relationships, and actual events occur at the "people-level." Just as US diplomats have become accustomed to working with their Chinese counterparts, it is probably time that the US military did some of the same so that communication can actually occur and either side can correct the deviation from reality that naturally takes place when two entities do not communicate. While we may not like each other or like what we see, we will more than likely have a more accurate perception about military intentions. We might even build that tiniest seed of trust between people that slowly develops into something more fruitful. 

Now, back to the Middle East.

Reflection on the Media

It is difficult for me this morning to grasp that September 11th happened nine years ago. The memory of it is still vivid and burned in my mind, as I know it is for all Americans. It is almost impossible to contemplate all that has taken place in the last nine years and to fully reflect on where we are now. I sit here today in the home country of one of the hijackers. It is Eid al Fitr here in the Islamic world. People are celebrating the end of Ramadan and enjoying their first big breakfasts in daylight. Lucille's, the diner in Maadi famous for American pancakes, was slammed yesterday morning. The streets are quiet and peaceful in the mornings. The Cairo air carried in it a tingle of cool breeze as I walked my dog at 9am.

In contrast to the travel advisory sent out two days ago, Cairo is relaxed, happy, and festive now. The response of many Egyptians to the madman in Florida has been one of calm observation. While they are deeply offended, they say that there are bad people everywhere. Violence is not warranted on their part and how can a man think that he could destroy the Quran anyway? How could a man destroy the word of God? It is impossible, he is only a man. The Quran will always be and he is only causing great offense to the many Muslims across the world.

There are many definitions of violence and abuse. I consider the Quran burning to be an act of violence. It is an act of hate towards a huge number of people. But then, it would not be so hurtful if not so many people knew of it. I hold the media responsible for fanning this flame. I am also aware that the general term "media" is over simplified and inadequate to fully address the issue. While it is the media's right to report what they choose, there should be discretion on their part and consideration of the consequences of their actions. This guy wanted all the media coverage and he got it.

Now the news is focused almost exclusively on America's diagnosis as Islamaphobic. You just need to look at the cover of Time magazine to see that. While the media does provide a certain amount of soul searching across the American public, I would also argue that it additionally reinforces ideas into the minds of most people. I hope it is not a sort of self fulfilling prophecy. If you focus on something obsessively you tend to become it. I am afraid that all this talk of Islamaphobia makes it more cemented into reality. It brings back old wounds and pains. We are rehashing the past again and again instead of moving forward in our relationships.

The media needs to recognize their power in stirring up emotion and shaping world view. I am sure they do already. They need to reconsider their role in national security. They need to remember that we are in a age of instant communication and interconnectivity. There is no longer one specific audience, like the American public, that receives a message. You cannot send out two different messages to two different audiences. You cannot say something to one and think the other has not heard. This is not the Cold War.  You have to remember our enemies exploit what we say and do. While fear should never be a driving factor in our actions, there is nothing wrong with sensible restraint.

Power Outage Distractions

Today is the beginning of Eid al Fitr, marking the celebratory end of Ramadan, ilhamdulillah. I intended to use this day for catching up in my national security / joint operations classes I am taking through correspondence. The classes coincidentally mesh rather well with my IR classes at The American University in Cairo (AUC) that started this week. I had just gotten to the point where I found a more satisfactory explanation of the American promotion of democracy world wide (I am not looking at this topic at the moment from a moral or ideological stand point but purely utilitarian benefit...maybe I'll return to this in a moment) when the internet died, half the house began losing power and then regaining it, and I somehow felt like I was back on a 40 year old warship having an engineering casualty.

My office lair complete with dog

Cairo is always plagued power outages and this summer has been the absolute worst. The power goes out at my house around every other day, generally at night. It is so predictable I have candles scattered throughout the house for more than aesthetic reasons. The power often fluctuates whether it goes out entirely or not and these occurrences result in flickering light bulbs, blown appliances, and so on. I usually lose power when I am deep in concentration reading an article on the internet, downloading a video or podcast, talking on skype, or doing any other number of things in my life that seem to center around the holy wireless internet set up. I do admit that maybe the setup could qualify for membership in the “ghetto” category:

The Holy Internet Configuration

I am aware I won't be passing any electrical safety inspections if anything of the sort exists in Egypt, the land of ungrounded electrical plugs. But this is nothing when you look at the basic set up for the phone line and incoming DSL line that originates from the laundry room:

Incoming phone and DSL line

This looks like there should be something more than a phone and DSL line coming from all this doesn't there? Especially looking at the enigmatic Panasonic box...well, I am sorry to disappoint, there is no fancy home intercom system or anything of the sort.

Today was a different experience than my usual power drops because only the downstairs items lost power quite suddenly. I though it must have something to do with my breakers (all pretty much unlabeled excepting those having undergone my trial and error experiments a year ago when I was trying to understand why my bathroom lights kept blowing up and blowing fuses). This phenomenon has of course been addressed on three different occasions by an electrician who rarely even shuts off power when tinkering with wiring. But, yes, all is as God wills it. Enshallah.

Danger indeed...

What will be the right answer today?

Finding nothing overly odd with the breaker box I assessed the situation to be a building phenomenon and not an isolated incident for me to deal with. I also unplugged the internet configuration when I realized that my router was on but nothing else showed power. Odd...

I donned an extra layer of clothing to cover my scandalous shoulders and went to ask the trusty bo'ab if there was something wrong with the electricity. La la...mafish mushkela, el karaba diyeefa dil'wati ashan eshirka. In other words, no problem...the electricity is "weak" right now because of the electrical company. I promptly unplugged anything of value that might get fried from insufficient power. Ah Cairo...how you always distract me when I am working.

So while I intended to write and post something useful, reflective, and indicative of the time I am passing reading riveting material like previous QDR's, the 2010 National Security Strategy, and my IR readings I have produced a pointless journal entry rant on my electrical irritations in Cairo. I can't always be serious.

Manhattan Mosque Musings

I have watched my home country from afar with dismay and alarm as the arguments for the Park 51 center have unfolded in Manhattan. I have waited through the days for the arguments to abate or come to reason but instead I have gradually sunk into dread and disappointment when reading the articles discussing the reactions and perceptions of Americans. I have heard irrational ridiculous arguments ranging from the lack of religious freedoms in Saudi Arabia to Nazis. Since when did my country draw comparisons and find relevance in the actions of another country that does not even afford women the legal right to drive? Saudi Arabia is a theocracy. No, nonmuslims cannot go to Mecca nor can a church be built there. But is our government a theocracy? Does our government have the right to endorse only one religion or exclude another?

I have heard repeatedly that the proposed mosque might receive funding from extremists or serve as a beacon of victory. “Muslims for Peace” sounds pretty extremist to me. A bunch of New Yorker moms is also rather intimidating. Furthermore, Imam Rauf, is a proponent of Sufi Islam, a neoplatonic (also a major influence for christian theologians like St. Augustine) influenced branch of Islam that many Muslims find so different that it is often considered outside the boundary of traditional Islam. Al Qaeda and other extremist organizations surely consider this proposed mosque an abomination. In fact, it is really a misnomer to call this project a mosque. It is a cultural center that happens to include a mosque. What if it also included a church, temple, and a yoga studio with free copies of “Eat, Pray, Love?” Would that solve it America?

There are a great deal of hysterics these days about Obama’s religion. As his approval rating goes down his potential “muslimness” goes up. “Muslim” must be quite the dirty word in the US these days. I do not remember being taught even in my West Texas government class that it was a Presidential requirement to be nonmuslim. Congratulations America on joining the countless Egyptians here in Cairo who also believe he is Muslim based primarily on his name, his skin color, and his attempts, albeit somewhat unsuccessful, to simmer down the tension in the Middle East. These are the same people who learn that the Holocaust is a Jewish conspiracy and never happened. These are the people who tell me that 9-11 was actually a Zionist conspiracy to get America to go to war with Muslim nations. In other words, one fifth of Americans are joining intellectual ranks with the typical Egyptian educated in very little outside of government propaganda. I’m sure all the members of the conspiracy theory club would agree that Obama is the author of this Ramadan quote: "Over the past month, Muslims have fasted, taking no food or water during daylight hours, in order to refocus their minds on faith and redirect their hearts to charity. Muslims worldwide have stretched out a hand of mercy to those in need. Charity tables at which the poor can break their fast line the streets of cities and towns. And gifts of food and clothing and money are distributed to ensure that all share in God's abundance. Muslims often invite members of other families to their evening iftar meals, demonstrating a spirit of tolerance." Nope. That was good ol’ George W in 2002, one year after September 11th. He must be a Muslim too. 

There are much more significant things to get excited about in the arena of US national security that have more relevance than a far fetched, paranoia of creeping extremist Islam. Maybe we should focus on issues of more pressing importance to our security, like how to address the national debt. Or maybe the concern voiced by General Petreaus in March about how the continuing Israeli-Palestinian conflict is jeopardizing American progress in the Arab region. It was announced yesterday that talks would resume September second for the first time in nearly 20 months. Perhaps we should use all our brainpower and energy to channel helpful reflection and analysis on how we might be successful in this endeavor rather than spinning up all our engines in an embarrassing display of Islamaphobia. Or maybe the issue of a nuclear Iran? Or dare I whisper it: China.  

Back at Ramadan

I know that it has been quite some time since I have written. While I may chastise myself for it, I know it was because I found myself busy with travel... even better, travel with another person. I was away from the busy streets of Cairo for so long that I actually began to long for it. It does hold a fascination and even romantic sway over my heart. It is at times hard to understand why, especially in consideration of the fact that not many people share my sentiments. I actually reminisce on the calls of the minarets across the hot, humid, and dust laden air. There is something mischievous in the smiles of the residents here, developed from years of living in one of the most frustrating, crowded, and oldest cities of the world. For being the “mother of the world,” Masr is rather cantankerous, spiteful at times, and most certainly aged in her appearance. She is not an aging great dame, but the ancient, doubled over, crone with so many wrinkles upon her face that her age seems unimaginable. Yet somewhere in those eyes you see strength and will that have been forged through time and experiences you will never understand. The great pyramids were over two thousand years old in Cleopatra’s day. The amount of time separating her from their construction is the amount of time that now separates us from the supposed Trojan War. That’s how I try to calculate the age of the pyramids in my head.

We returned the first day of Ramadan, a completely different face for Cairo to put on. The streets are empty in the day and packed in anticipation at dusk. Ramadan in August is excruciating. For the majority there is no A/C in this hot month, making the abstinence from water or any liquids all the more torturous. Perhaps even worse is the demanding daylight hours without a single cigarette or puff of sheesha. Those Egyptians you do find out in the heat of the day are more than on edge.

We were with Sabah a few nights ago for iftar, or the literal breaking of the fast. As always when we are guests in her house, she is the epitome of hospitality. I watched with great respect as she cooked for hours in the hot kitchen, preparing the night’s iftar without tasting a single bit of food or having a drink of water. She only occasionally wiped her forehead with cool water for some relief. We waited out the heat on the couch watching “B” movies from the US I had never heard of, let alone seen. These are the favorites in Egypt, a place that still highly values the macho, cigarette smoking, karate chopping, infinite bullet shooting hero. And there is nothing like the dialogue of a bad martial arts movie to knock the rust off your arabic.

The anticipation for the call to prayer was restrained but still very much felt as we sat around a feast that was enough to feed us all four times over. The TV gave a canon shot when the appointed time had arrived but it was unnecessary as the entire city was filled with the call from the mosques. For the first time I witnessed Sabah without her usual restraint. The liquids were most important. They were as various as the feast: tamarind, mango, and many more. As usual, the majority of the food was left for us. And also as usual, the event turned into something similar to a college frat event with cheering to continue eating past the point of comfort or reason. But alas, that is the hospitality here. After a year I have gradually managed to learn new tricks to keep myself from having to eat to the point of pain, especially in the category of meat. But it is impossible to not eat a lot without giving offense. These days I starve myself all day and maybe the previous day in preparation. The food is excellent as always. The best food in Egypt is found in homes and not in restaurants.

It is true that Egypt feels like home to me these days. It will be the longest I have lived in one house for nearly decade. I am greeted by friends here after being gone for six weeks like I have been gone for years. Cairo has its moments that make me want to hide away in my home of books, movies, and painting. But most of the time it still feels like I’m on an adventure, even after a year.

A Typical Evening

A refresher from the heat.

“انتي عسل” (You are honey) The man shouted as we walked across the road in front of the Ramses Hilton, having just watched Clash of the Titans in 3D. Awful film, I don’t recommend it. We will be going to see Robin Hood, aka the “Tea Partier” next week. Thankfully Sarah Palin does not star as Maid Marian. I would never be able to stomach a film, even with my favorite actor Russell Crowe, if I had to listen to any words from her that lasted for over 10 seconds. As for the accusations of Robin Hood’s tea party sentiments, I am not sure I quite comprehend since he seems to be the embodiment of wealth distribution and socialism. I guess I will just have to see the film.

Cairo is getting hot these days. We are regularly making it into the 40‘s...for you American types, 100‘s. The heat accentuates the vibrant bouquet of petrol, dust, sheesha, and koshari wafting in the streets. It is followed by a finishing taste of some sort of carcinogenic chemical in the mouth. Cairo is, for the obsessive compulsive germ killing, anti bacterial handwash using, typical American, worse than the Nightmare on Elm Street. I long ago stopped caring. I admit to carrying hand-sanitizer with me should I ever truly get into a real mess but in the end I am not sure if it is anything more powerful or effective than a placebo.

We made it to a famous قهوة, or cafe, in wist ilbalad (downtown) where we engaged in one of my favorite Egyptian past times, drinking delicious blends of fresh fruit drinks combined with a fruity شيشة sheesha. For me it was a cocktail of freshly blended mango, strawberries, and banana garnished with fresh fruit around the rim and complemented by cantaloupe sheesha. After about 10 minutes we were laughing hysterically together, our bodies not accustomed to nicotine in vast quantities. Thankfully my sheesha smoking habit is generally limited to a once or twice a month periodicity. But again, breathing the air here is comparable to something like smoking two packs of cigarettes a day. I don’t think cantaloupe sheesha will add greatly to my exposure to unhealthiness. I know I have built up immunity anyway, I stopped getting sick every couple weeks about 5 months ago. I noticed more than anything my loss of the ability to smell. When I travel elsewhere it comes back after a few days. Upon my return to Cairo it is like I smell it all again for the first time and wonder why I have never noticed this smell before. After 24 hours I am reacclimatized and no longer notice anything peculiar.

The waiters joked with us and constantly tried to figure out my nationality. I am usually accused of being German, followed by Dutch, and Russian a distant third. Oh, and French is suggested as well because of my appearance of “sophistication” that I do not necessarily agree with. I thought my still heavily accented arabic would give my nationality away. “هي مصرية” (She’s Egyptian) My friend told them. They laugh but are thankfully not too prying. The coals on the hookah get changed more often than the other customers, the man likes to talk to two women more than anyone else. Through the screen I see the men across the street glancing at us as they sweep the floors of their shops for probably the 5th time that day. The call for مغرب maghrib is echoing in the busy streets. I take a moment to relish my surroundings, the taste of cantaloupe and strawberry, the fading light, the continual smile of my good friend who seems to be one of those people blessed with happiness and bringing it to others. I think this place has changed me more than I know. I wonder what I will be like when I return after years spent here.

The Experiment

The higab cultural experiment had begun about a week ago. The endless files of honking cars and taxis, shouting men, long violating stares, had driven her to see what happened if she did enough to make herself look Egyptian at first glance. She knew her Egyptian friends received their fair share of inappropriate attentions as well. But she wanted to see how drastic the difference was, between being Egyptian and being a Western as a lone female walking on a sidewalk.

She walked out and at first noticed the drastic drop in noise she had come to acquaint with Cairo’s busy streets. Oh, the noise was there but the honking had dropped to maybe a quarter of what it had been before. She keep walking wondering if perhaps she had stepped out in a freak moment. She passed the Coptic church, no one, especially the leering security guards, gave her a second look. She did not feel herself being undressed with raw and shameless stares that felt no compulsion to look away, even though they were aware that she was aware of what they were doing. Even better, she knew she would be free to “stroll” through Cairo a bit more and enjoy the scenery. Perhaps she could stop and draw or take pictures without being swarmed. She did remember being told if you walk too slow, Egyptian or not, and seem as though you have no purpose then men will think you are “looking for something.” Well, she had a tool to make herself more invisible at least.

Here men did not like their women to laugh loud, especially in public. Laughter and a loud voice draw attention to a woman. They suggest that she would like this attention brought to her. She should want no male attention or attraction except for that of her husband. Therefore, loud laughter is nearly as provocative as tight clothing that shows the body’s shape and form.

She sat with a friend who, in addition to his wife and family, had become her friend over the past few months. She liked to listen to the thoughts of an Egyptian man who she already knew was a good person, a good friend, and with whom she had an agreement for both sides to be open minded and not take offense. He and his wife, both quite educated, were of a conservative mindset with regard to Islam. He had lightly, though not overtly, suggested through the months that she might try wearing the higab and loose clothes to better her experience. Many Egyptian women wear the higab as a form of fashion, their bodies are fully covered but clothes are brightly and beautifully colored, shapely, and even tight, just like the match stick jeans worn in the US. But according to some, this is not the correct; the true higab is something that does not show the shape of body parts, specifically areas like the chest and hips.

“But why is this necessary? Should a woman be ashamed of her body? Should she think her body evil in some way?”

“No, no of course not. But she should not attract men to her with her body. The only person allowed to feel attraction towards her is her husband.”

“Yes, but is not this the problem of the man and not the woman if he feels this attraction? Should he not exert control over himself?” She asked.

“I understand what you think but here is not like the west. There are no relations before marriage. This is utterly forbidden. If a man has no money, etc then he cannot marry. So he may be a young man but unable to have relations. It is very hard for him to bear seeing women and not feel attraction. Seeing the shape of a woman’s body causes this and it is wrong. This is why our prophet said to marry as early as possible, so that there is an appropriate outlet for these feelings.” He said.

“Again, did not God make women’s bodies in this shape? How could his creation be something that must be covered? And did He not also make men driven to be with women? Why is it only the women who must suffer from this circumstance? Why is there not more solution directed towards the man and controlling himself? And do you think women suffer no desire for men? Do you think women do not look upon the bodies of men?”

“A woman must only attract her husband. And the direction for dress is clear, I cannot argue this. Whether we agree or not there must be faith, for this is what is said.”

“It does not say these things in the Quran from what I understand.”

But the Quran is not the source for all things in the religion, such as the five prayers. These come from the Hadith and the life of Mohammed. She already knew this. Ah well, it was only a discussion anyway. Sometimes she thought of it as only a culturally relative situation with arguments found world wide voiced more strongly. For example, a young teenager, or any woman really, who dressed a bit on the “scandalous” side with respect to American culture would be seen to have loose morals or look somewhat inappropriate. Why do we have these thoughts? Do we think she is drawing undue attention to herself and her body? She is probably knowingly doing it as well, perhaps making it more justified to criticize her. Granted, the American “lines” have significantly more freedom and are without much of overt language of Islam. But in the end, some of the same feelings about women and their bodies are harbored world wide.

Ah well, she had her invisibility cloak for Cairo now. She felt protected by it. She had more appreciation now for why some women might choose to wear it. A friend of hers had commented that he was surprised she had lasted as long as she did without eventually covering up. Was she giving in by doing it or was it simply opening a few more doors and windows into life here? She couldn’t answer that question.